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xwonderxchickx
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Name: Rachel
Birthday: 4/8/1987
Gender: Female
Interests: Anything outdoorsie...hiking, camping, white water rafting. I enjoy yoga, dance classes. and youth group. I love hanging out with all my girls...going to Ashville, going to Bean Street..whatever I feel like doing.
Expertise: I am only 17 obviously I am not an expert at anything...unless shopping is a sport..which I doubt!!
Occupation: Student
Message: message me
AIM:  SHMAZZLEDOO
Member Since:
12/22/2004
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there are several reasons why i love this picture....1)josh is in it
2)my hair looks like a mohawk...and man oh man do i love mohawks 3)josh
is in it...wait i already said that 
so my little sis and i ran an errand after she got out of school
today...it was the first REAL conversation i have had with her in a
while, she is so smart and pretty i wish she could see that. She
has such opportunity and drive if she could only see that too.
right now she is upstairs fighting with the boy who she is choosing not
to go to a christian college for. i was a horrible example to
her...i left attached when i went to lipscomb...and here i am back
again...only if i could show her that she is missing out
tremendously..or however you spell it...on growth for her christian
walk...which is more important than any boy. I'm praying that i
can become a better example for her.
on another note...i am finished with classes until the fall. it
was 67 degrees here in the mountains. and it was a fantastic day.
te amo joshua.
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| im sitting in this freezing basement with a space heater on thinking
about how pathetic i have let my life become lately. but today is
not the day for a pity party.
there are so many words that could be spoken right now, so many things
that should be written. but words are translated all the same and
have been uttered since the begininng of time...how could three of them
placed together in this sequence still ring such meaning and hope to
me...even though they have been said so many times before? The
space is just space that seperates my arms from wrapping around you so
tight and stating that sequence of three clear and proud into your
eager ears.
. .... ...
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| Contentment. it's funny how we as people.. me specifically
lately....find ourselves getting so obsorbed in our own daily problems
that we overlook the large beautiful picture around us. i have given up
on apologizing i believe that is the dumbest way to show that you
regret what you did....so i have started just living and
explaining...it leaves no room for confusion. how simple this all
is....even with a full plate right now it has never been so in the
light and simple. i have been thumbing through my past these last few
weeks and have found no reason to want to revisit it but now understand
why things happened the way they did...sometimes a little closure is
all you really needed....and now i feel free to move on. the things i
have done these past couple of weeks on my journey to move myself from
the rut i thought i was pronounced dead in...i feel i could never
explain to another...and if i was found in the middle of that search
there would be no way to back track and save what i have been preparing
for nine years in the making. through the shadow of death i have come
and he hasn't left my side. so its time to move on because i have been
pulled from the rusted pit that i thought i would miserably LIE
in....its time...its time for loving with all i have with no regrets
knowing it is what is making me, me...its time to just let go and make
people wonder why im smiling...its time to feel responsible and
proud...its time to feel accomplished no matter what the temporary
perspectives around me feel is a complete disaster.....its time...its a
time that is supposedly the best of our lives...be inspired...live in
the moment...sing at the top of your lungs and gaze at the beauty that
HE has so graciously placed around you.....
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| when is the right time to release? cause i have to let this go.
its time for me to jump in with my eyes closed trusting only the unseen
that continues to guide me unscathed.
the need is growing and im restless again...
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| . for every tear that you have let trickle down your
face hoping that by letting it go it will somehow free the evil that
tears at your heart. when you go looking for something to replace what
you can't commit to only to find that it is full of nothingness and
regret just like your broken spirit. why is there no place that
can calm? why is there only wondering for the gypsy and misfits? every
ounce of my blood is wanting to drain into my feet if i can't scream
these words out that are tangled and caught in my throat. when i tell
you something take it to heart and dont let it brush by like clouds
passing in the heavens. dont lock up what is so openly given to
you...what good on God's green earth is that going to do but push my
non-commiting self away from your loving embrace that takes away the
fears that murk my vision? the green patches that we encounter on our
enchanted evenings together are followed by winters of darkness that
chill me to the bone. i run right back into the circle that drove me
out in the first place.
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